Blackmail

I may have to use these someday, so I need to write these down.

Maleia: "Boys can't have babies because a baby can't fit through a penis."

Maleia: "But I will be a mommy someday...."
Haley: "You can't be a mommy on Sunday!!"
Maleia: "No, I said someday."

Haley: "When will I get boobs?"
Me: "When you are older."
Haley: "After I have babies?"
Me: "um, probably in high school."
Haley: "So I will have a baby in High School?"
Me: "Nooooooo!"

Dylan: "I go pee pee."
Me: "Good boy! Thanks for telling me."
Dylan: "I handsome cuz I go pee pee."

(After his sister accidently hit him on his private.)
Dylan: "I owie!"
Me: "Where sweetie?"
Dylan: "On that thing."
Me: "Oh. On your penis?"
Dylan: "Yup. Kiss it betto mommy."
Me: "Sorry buddy. I can give you a hug and a kiss on the cheek, though."

Poland = Pottery, Pals, Pedicures, Perogies, Perfect Place!

The happy crew before leaving on our Polish Adventure!!

Ahhh! Polish Pottery. Now I know what all the hype is about. They had me at Zloti. (Which is the Polish money. Isn't is a cute name for money?) I even did my research. I mean, I HAD to, I was going with hard core pottery shoppers who had checklists and stuff. We even brought a Zloti to Dollars converter chart, so we didn't have to do math in our heads. Wasting time was NOT on the agenda. Do you know how many Polish Pottery patterns there are?? Me neither. But there are tons! And many I didn't even see online until I got there.

We stayed at this quaint bed and breakfast in Boleslaweic called the Blue Beetroot B&B and it was adorable. We had 9 women, 2 cars, 1 baby, 14 hours of driving, and 3 days of fun! I shopped for 22 people total and what better than to shop knowing that you can buy for someone else?? Okay, so sending it is going to be a pain, but Christmas is done. (Surprise! Surprise! to those family members on my Christmas list.) But if you know me and the post office, well, we just don't get along too well. There are few things that I HATE in this world and sending things is one of them. Don't ask. I would refer to my childhood and that would just stem boredom.

So next year, and yes, there will be a next year, I will only get a few items instead of 7 BOXES of pottery. Just so I remember, my list includes: sugar bowl, picture frame, the HUGE bowl in my favorite pattern, and a teapot. So I HAVE to go back.

The crew at the first place we went. This was the only pic of the shopping girls. No time for pictures. It wasn't on the agenda.

We went through Slovakia and we stopped at Mc-E-D's for lunch and I just thought this was funny... as if the whole IDEA of McDonald's isn't enough of a "taste of America." They didn't even know how to say these American words. I was listening to some Slovakians trying to order these and they were butchering the words. "beff" for "beef" and "toas-tes" for "tastes" are the ones that I can remember.

Dinner with the girls!

Typical Polish neighborhood. Complete with sheep and chickens.

This is some famous glass blowing factory that sells things for booku bucks. Needless to say, I didn't purchase anything here. It was fun to watch them make them, though.

The car crew among the giant pieces of pottery.

Male or Female?? He might just need a bro. (Instead of a bra.)

Haha! Definitely male. I do have to say that I know that my family reads this blog and you have to just disregard this and know that they count this as "art" here. It doesn't have to be beautiful. ummm, I was just trying to take a picture of the sunflower behind him???.... Sorry grandma.

I have a thing for cool cemeteries! I don't get why people think they are creepy. It's the alive people we should be scared of. This cemetery was beautiful!

I want a tree like this one. Money doesn't grow on trees, but in Poland, pottery does!

Until next year ladies!!

Hard. Core.

Being a camper who would motorcycle in to a camping spot and everything we needed was on our backs, this is kind of embarrassing to admit that we camped out on our patio last night. Though I still think it was a great idea. Here is the low down: We settle down to bed after reading our chapter in Charlotte's Web, sing songs, pray, and read scriptures then giggle for about 30-45 min. Taking turns throwing pillows and piling on daddy. Then the real fun begins. . . . starting at 9:30pm.

• Haley is cold, so I go and get her a jacket.

• Maleia is cold, we go get a space heater and warmer jammies.

• Dylan can't decide where to sleep. He kept getting up and going from one queen size mattress to the other. Each girl beckoning him to their mattress and causing some hurt feelings when he ends up on the hard floor in the middle.

• Haley wakes up and needs to go potty.
  

• Maleia wakes up and wants water. Whines so much she wakes up her brother who insisted that he wanted water too.
  

• Dylan wakes up because he can't find his binky. He wakes up Haley who asks if it's time to get ready for school yet.
  

• B gives up at 3am and goes inside. WIMP! (see what I am dealing with? sigh.) And for some reason he didn't like being called a wimp at 3am. . .
  

• B comes in at 5am to kiss me goodbye... for work! (phew. He still loves me.) And wakes up Dylan while zipping up the zipper of the tent. (Paybacks...)
  

• I lay with Dylan who miraculously ended up on an air mattress. Every 5 min. I open my eyes to him staring at me. After 30 min. of Dylan squirming, I go inside and put him in his crib.
  

• I go back to sleep in the tent and wake up at 8 to Maleia calling my name. I get up and she announces: "That was the BEST NIGHT EVER!"
  

• I go inside to Haley already up and dressed and eating breakfast. She was disappointed that there was no school. And then said, "Can we do that again tonight?"
  

So I feel we aren't as bad as the campers we saw at my family's campground (Campground at Woodland Park) with their 35 foot RVs and satellite dishes. We don't do much camping (to my chagrin) and this is what I could convince B to do.

I have to admit. It was fun despite the craziness in the night. Needless to say, we are forgoing our planned camping trip during fall break to Croatia. . . bring on the all-inclusive!

Maleia's b-day party

Maleia Monique Chapman is now 4 years old. What an accomplishment. We were worried we were going to loose her a few times... literally, but her mischievous ways are just what make Maleia who she is. I'm sure she'll get lost a few more million times, but we know that our family would be lost without her. She brings an amazing spirit into our home. If you haven't had the privilege of getting a squeezer hug from her, you are missing out. My favorite is when she will randomly say "I love you" at several intervals during the day.

This year she asked for an Oreo pie, so for the family party on her actually birthday, we made her favorite pie. I think we all devoured it in 5 seconds flat.

She has been wanting a Pocahontas Barbie for MONTHS and I told her she would have to wait until Christmas, so this was a total surprise for her. She even said, "Haley you can have the one I am getting for Christmas." How sweet.

I tried to get a picture of her right before her party, and she was being so silly.

She would not let go of her new plush piggie that we got her and her pig balloon for one second. Even to blow out her candles.

I am no cake genius, but this was fun to create with the kiddos. They "helped" a lot.

I had to add this picture of Dylan and his best friend Scarlett. It truly amazes me how long they can play together without so much as a whimper of injustice or fighting. She calls him "D" and he calls her "Cawett." sigh. I just wish they could grow up together.

Before I knew it, they were opening presents (guests included) and I couldn't keep track of who gave what, but she was thrilled with everything she received from her amazing friends. That big one is an easel that they play with on a daily basis. Really.

A Chapman birthday party can't be complete without a pinata. Maleia held this pinata pig under her arm for a whole day and even named it pinky, so I was a little worried when it came time to slaughter it. But she was first in line and even gave it a few extra strong whacks.

Her adorable fellow farmer friends.

Getting dirty on the farm. Plantin' new crops maybe? Maleia's Farm Party was a huge success and though I had 6 activities planned and we only did 3 of them, I had to let go and just let them run around like the wild monkeys that they are and just let them play.

My cute farmer girl. You can barely tell that she cut her bangs a couple weeks ago... almost.

2 cute sisters. Haley would do anything for Maleia. She is first to her rescue when she is sad. She is usually the first one to find her when she wanders away and has been known to even put her sister's wishes before her own. What great friends they are already!!

All in all, this girl is the one that gives more love than anyone I know. And we love her so much! Here is to another year!

Chat of the Day

Setting: Bathtime

Feeling: Wet and unclean

Dylan: I want my boat.
Me: Try again.
Dylan: Peez can I may have my boat?
Me: Your boat huh? Where is your boat?
Dylan: In da big room.
Me: What does it look like?
Dylan: It's cute
Me: Cute? And what else does it look like?
Dylan: It's handsome
Me: oookay. Wait right here, I'll go find it.
Dylan: Oh mommy. Tie 'gain.
Me: Huh? Oh, please wait right here.
Dylan: Okay mommy.

This is what he was referring to.

A bath sponge aka "boat"
Though, ours is a little more cute and handsome than this one. Ours has yellow duckies on it.
_________________________________

The only way I can get lotion on Dylan is if you make sound effects as you squirt it on him. Preferably farting, gun shooting, and exploding sounds.

__________________________________

If you can figure out what he is saying here, you win:
"I want you to comere and carro me to go cackle Daddy"